[Rob HT5]

2 Women on their way back from a night out, stop in a graveyard for a wee.
One wipes her lulu with her knickers, the other uses a wreath.
The next day, their 2 husbands are in the pub talking.
One says "I think I had better keep a close eye on my missus, she came home last night with no knickers on.
The other says "thats nothing, mine had a card wedged in her butt cheeks that said "we will never forget you, from all the lads at the fires station"

I got married for a laugh!

Im still waiting

 

[Tallwallfitter]

Kate Price has Superman tattood on her right ankle and Clarke Kent on the left ankle. Thats because you never see them together I:

 

[Rob HT5]

I felt sorry for the hypnotist i saw last night.
He had 7 men under his spell, as he walked around the stage, he fell over his microphone wire and shouted "f*** me".
What happened next will haunt me forever.

 

[Rob HT5]

John decided to go skiing with his mate, Keith. So they loaded up John's minivan and headed up northto Inverness.

After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.

'I realize it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed,' she explained. 'I'm afraid the neighbours will talk if I let you stay in my house.'

'Don't worry,' John said. 'We'll be happy to sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light.' The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night.

Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way.
They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.

But about nine months later, John got an unexpected letter from a solicitor. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the solicitor of that attractive widow he had met on the ski weekend.

He dropped in on his friend Keith and asked, 'Keith, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up in Inverness about 9 months ago?'

'Yes, I do.' Said Keith.

'Did you, ER, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit ?'

'Well, um, yes!,' Keith said, a little embarrassed about being found out, 'I have to admit that I did..'

'And did you happen to give her my name instead of telling her your name?'

Keith's face turned bright red and he said,
'Yeah, look, I'm sorry, mate. I'm afraid I did.' 'Why do you ask?'








'She just died and left me everything.'

 

[jammy12]

two nuns cycling down a cobbled street one says ive never come this way before "the other says no its must be the cobbles "

 

[Rob HT5]

Seven dwarfs in the bath all feeling happy.

Then happy got out.

So they all felt grumpy.

Ah the old ones are always the bestT:

 

[Ged]

2 Women on their way back from a night out, stop in a graveyard for a wee.
One wipes her lulu with her knickers, the other uses a wreath.
The next day, their 2 husbands are in the pub talking.
One says "I think I had better keep a close eye on my missus, she came home last night with no knickers on.
The other says "thats nothing, mine had a card wedged in her butt cheeks that said "we will never forget you, from all the lads at the fires station"

Hahahahahahahahahaha! LOL:
quality! T:

 

[shaunr68]

2 Women on their way back from a night out, stop in a graveyard for a wee.
One wipes her lulu with her knickers, the other uses a wreath.
The next day, their 2 husbands are in the pub talking.
One says "I think I had better keep a close eye on my missus, she came home last night with no knickers on.
The other says "thats nothing, mine had a card wedged in her butt cheeks that said "we will never forget you, from all the lads at the fires station"

Brilliant! LOL:A: